When I was a kid Dairy Queen was special. In the summer we would go for Mister Misty floats (now renamed something gender non-specific), and one time I even braved a banana split, minus the bananas of course. Then, when they invented the Blizzard in 1985, I felt my eyes had been opened to magical new worlds of ice cream awesomeness.

Now I’m older, and Dairy Queen isn’t quite the same. If I wanted I could eat there every day, although thankfully I don’t, and when I do go I don’t get that mystical feeling. That would be fine, and an expected outcome of getting older, but this post has to do with a different aspect of Dairy Queen.

Recently I went to Dairy Queen and ordered some sort of brownie/ice-cream/chocolate concoction. The ice cream was good, but the syrup was too sweet, and the brownie was sweeter than the syrup. Plus, the brownie and syrup comprised over half of the entire desert. The thing was basically inedible, except for the little bits of ice cream that I could excavate from between the gross syrup and brownie parts.

So, I wonder. Have Dairy Queen treats become grosser, or have my tastes changed? I think it is the former, since my tastes in other desserts haven’t changed much. So then why is Dairy Queen making these gross things? Have they focus grouped these desserts and determined they test well with people who like gross things? Are people who like gross things Dairy Queen’s main demographic target? I’m guessing the answer must be yes. They have even started mixing syrup in with the Blizzards.

Anyway, I’ll stick to my Blizzards, and I’ll make sure to request it be kept syrup-free.